Monkey Business


Thanks a lot, honey. 

Not-so-great Mother’s Day gifts 

Garbage lamp?

“My husband got me a really beautiful lamp one year. It had a vintage look to it, was colorful — which I love — and seemed like a really thoughtful gift. Yeah … he garbage picked it. I’m not snobby when it comes to spending money on gifts, but I kind of draw the line at garbage. It seemed like he just drove by a pile in someone’s driveway and thought, ‘This will do.’ It didn’t even work! He didn’t bother to test it before he gave it to me, which showed me that he was too busy or too dumb to care.” Anna, 37, Wisconsin

Breakfast in bed: food poisoning

“He and the kids made me breakfast in bed. It gave me food poisoning. We think it was the spinach they used. At the time, I was in agonizing pain and stuck in the bathroom for hours at a time, so I just kept cursing them out to myself. But, it was a sweet gesture. Breakfast in bed is a pretty standard Mother’s Day gift, so at least they made theirs stand out.” – Lisa, 42, California

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