Note: Cathy’s written about dog obedience training and this is her take on dogs after going through the training with her own dog.I’ve been thinking a lot about dogs lately, more than usual. Maybe it’s because I have one chewing on my leg for about three hours each day. Maybe it’s because I live with a dog that doesn’t fit all my preconceived notions of what a dog should do.I think my preconceived notions are based on myths, like the following:Myth #1: You get the dog you deserve. What this means: what you put in, you’ll get out. If you spend a reasonable amount of time training your dog, you’ll have a reasonably trained dog. If you show love and affection to your dog, you’ll end up with a loving and affectionate dog. I probably don’t deserve any dog. I haven’t put in, as I should. I’ve gone shopping and forgotten his dog food. There are nights he’s had to eat dried up bologna for dinner.Myth #2: Pick a smart dog because they are easier to train. If you happen to get a dog smarter than a human, like our Border Collie, Hydee, watch out. We used to put Hydee in our fenced-in backyard when we left the house. When we came home, we’d find her lying on the front porch. We patrolled the borders, looking for gaps in the fenced area. If we found one, we closed it. But it never mattered to Hydee. Whenever we came home, she would be lying on the front porch.I was determined to discover how she escaped, so I placed her in the backyard, and sat in a lawn chair with a sandwich (bait) waiting for her to take on the role of escape artist.She went for it – one body part at a time, squeezing through the four-inch range. She was out on the other side in a heartbeat, tickled to share my sandwich, and it only took about 5 seconds.I remembered an ingenious neighbor about a mile away who had a little white snowball kind of dog and a range fence pen where they kept him when they were gone. They tied one end of a three-foot rope to the dog’s collar and the other end to an empty milk jug. The dog could get out the fence, but couldn’t get further than three feet away.I ordered the kids to drink the rest of the milk and find a rope. We rinsed out the jug, tied it to the rope, and then tied the other end to the collar of a dozing Hydee. She opened one eye and, puzzled, sat up to see what we’d attached to her. After a good stretch, she headed for the kitchen to check out the dog dish. First step she took, the empty milk jug rattled on the hardwood floor behind her, scaring her into a run. She picked up the pace, but the relentless milk jug was just as fast as she was. She rounded a corner and the jug swung wide, hitting the entertainment center and making a racket. The now-terrified dog raced around the house like a tornado, the milk jug banging along behind, making enough noise to wake the dead.I must confess, to my shame, I couldn’t help her because I was rolling on the floor laughing. In the end, it took three of us to tackle her and hold her down long enough to untie the rope from her collar. She spent the rest of the day suspiciously glaring at us from underneath the coffee table.Myth #3: Dogs have an innate desire to please their masters. Right. That’s why they roll in the fresh stuff over in the horse pasture. They think WE like it.Myth #4: Dogs are better readers of character than people are. This may be true sometimes, but not always. I’ve heard too many stories of how the “alarm dog” of the family welcomed an intruder in through the window, and then showed him where the family kept the silver. Our current dog doesn’t trust my husband at all. Every other dog he’s ever known has loved him immediately, fools that they were. She’s the only one who knows he has a secret life as an ax murderer.Myth #5: Your dog will pick up your personality. Please God, don’t let this one be true. The last thing I need is a four-legged me around. Someone who snaps at the children when she’s tired, pouts when things don’t go her way, holds grudges against people she thinks have done her wrong. Nope, I’ve never yet met a dog with a personality like mine and I hope I never do.
