Mark Stoller and his wife, Andra, moved to Falcon with their family in 2007. Both are U.S. Air Force veterans and enjoy life with their daughters, extended family and adopted rescue dogs in Latigo. Mark is fortunate to have his wife and daughters as his muse for topics, people to meet and places to investigate.
Reflection and change
By Mark Stoller
At the end of each year, I review our family calendar and write down the significant events, trips and milestones. It brings back good memories and there is a lot to be thankful for.
I also use the month of December to prepare for the upcoming year.
Thinking about personal goals and making a vision board is something I have written about previously. The problem is that your goals look good on paper. There’s no follow through; the vision board is eventually overlooked and it ends up in a closet by March.
There are improved versions of the vision board. One is the action board and the other is the becoming board. They each serve a different purpose.
A “vision board” is a visual representation of your dreams and aspirations, typically made up of images and quotes that constitute the end product of your goals.
An “action board” focuses on the specific steps and tasks needed to reach those goals, including deadlines and detailed plans to turn your vision into reality.
A “becoming board” captures the day-to-day activities in pictures. You will remove the Pinterest pictures on your board and replace them with pictures of you doing the activities of accomplishing your goals.
This ties in with James Clear’s “Atomic Habits” of creating personal systems for change. True behavior change is identity change. You might start a habit because of motivation, but the only reason you’ll stick with one is that it becomes part of your identity.
Anyone can convince themselves to visit the gym or eat healthy once or twice. However, if you don’t shift your belief behind the behavior, then you will not sustain long-term changes.
Improvements are only temporary until they become part of who you are. The goal is not to read a book; the goal is to become a reader. The goal is not to run a marathon; the goal is to become a runner.
Again, traditional vision boards showcase only the glamorous end goals with photos of a beach vacation, money and possessions, etc. A becoming board focuses on who you need to transform into every single day so you can achieve your goals.
Here are the steps and thought processes to create your becoming board:
- Ask yourself, “What does a typical day of activities look like now — and with adding your goals?”
- Write down a list of images you might see yourself doing each day to coincide with the activity list you just made. Examples are pictures of running, reading a book, a new language, clean and organize the house, investing money or pick up a musical instrument.
- Open Pinterest and copy and paste representative photos to match your new goal activity list on the becoming board.
- Final and most important step — take a picture of you doing the becoming activities. You will replace the Pinterest picture with the picture of you on the becoming board.
The becoming board is about the daily commitment to transform and see your hard work reflected on the board and in real life.
Another improvement for me, in 2026, is the 20/20/20 technique to start each day. It is a morning routine introduced by Robin Sharma in his book “The 5 AM Club.”
You awaken at 5 a.m. and spend your first hour of the day doing three important things for 20 minutes each: exercise (calisthenics, yoga, stretching), reflection (review your calendar, recent events, meditate), personal growth (learn something new, TED talk).
If you accomplish these three in your first hour, you’ll be ready for any challenges.
I wish you all a Merry Christmas.
